Today’s podcast episode title speaks for itself. Join me as I sit naked in a bath while my Fiance Ellie gives me a haircut.

Day two, and my housemates have already decided they would rather give our daily family walk a miss. They said they had to do some work, but I suspect it might be due to the fact that I spent the last one commentating on the entire thing for this podcast. So I head out alone, except there are pesky people everywhere, meaning most of my walk consists of me diligently avoiding people whilst of course providing comprehensive commentary. But do I manage to keep more than two metres away from my fellow walkers? Find out in today’s dramatic instalment of The Eagle Is stranded!

A few people have asked for some podcasts from me over this time of lockdown. When I say “a few,”, I really do mean a few, but still, I’m very egocentric and so have decided to attempt to release a podcast for everyday of the lockdown process (so a minimum of three weeks). Given that I’m stuck in the same place for the foreseeable future, rather than gigging across the country, which is what I’d ordinarily be doing, I am calling this series The Eagle Is Stranded! Join me and my fellow housemates Ben and Ellie for episode one, in which we take advantage of our government-approved bout of exercise and go for a walk in remote rural Sheffield.

Self-isolation is affecting us all in different ways. Me? I’ve taken up poetry.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=olwSXFcEPpU&t=10s

Well, all our gigs have been cancelled for the foreseeable future, so what is there for us to do but take the opportunity to release a Young’uns Podcast. It’s Saint Patrick’s day, but the pubs are closed, so let’s celebrate with our podcast featuring a song all about Saint Patrick as written and performed by Stanley Accrington, who also recounts his most surreal/worst gig experience of his forty years performing.

Download it here
Listen to past episodes here

A couple of months back I received a message from the comedian Phil Nichol. He said he was launching a new comedy video channel and wanted me to be one of the first twenty comedians to help get it off the ground. I was quite surprised by this for two reasons. Firstly, there are some pretty established comedians involved in this project: Arthur Smith,Jen Brister, Jarred Christmas … and I am almost certainly the least well-known comedian on the list by some margin. Secondly, the idea of this project is that we record and edit our own videos, which is not the easiest task for someone who is blind.

I am in fact harbouring the suspicion that my inclusion is a bit of a piss-take, and they are hoping that I will produce the most lacklustre, out-of-focus videos that will prove to be funny for all the wrong reasons; I am being laughed at rather than laughed with. Perhaps this is a ploy part-instigated by the more successful blind comedian Chris McCausland to destroy my career. He has just started doing TV panel shows, and perhaps he was getting worried that, just as he begins to make a name for himself, I come along and start winning these various comedy competitions. I’ve heard that he was particularly vexed when BBC Radio 4’s programme for blind People, In Touch, chose me rather than him to talk about being a blind comedian. Perhaps he is fearing that one day I might steal his TV work, especially given that I have the added cachet of being a folk singer. Is it merely coincidence that Chris McCausland was recently spotted in a folk club?

Well, whatever the reasons for my involvement, I have accepted this challenge and will be releasing videos on a fortnightly basis. The video channel is called The Lost Comics, and my first video for the channel is entitled David Eagle VS Google. And here it is.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IBBd8QTJexg&t=19s

This weekend I’ll be doing three shows with the wonderful comedian and songwriter Paul Silky White. ON Friday we’re in HUSTHWAITE, Tickets here. ON Saturday night we’re in Settle, Tickets here. And on Sunday afternoon we’re performing at Glasgow Comedy Festival, Tickets here.

I appreciate that a lot of people are advising to stay indoors and to not take part in mass gatherings, but hopefully I can allay your fears by reminding you that I have spent most of my life singing traditional folk songs and playing the accordion, which, surprising as it may seem to you, doesn’t tend to attract the hoards. In fact, depending on the size of your family, it might actually be safer for you to come to our gigs than staying at home.

Tickets and details of all my upcoming gigs can be found on my gigs page here.

Hope to see you soon. Come and say hi, and we can elbow bump.

Last night I was interviewed about my comedy on BBC Radio 4. It was on their programme designed for blind people, In Touch. While other comedians are paying vast sums for PR people, I manage to circumvent all that and gain five minutes of air time on a national BBC radio station for free, and all I had to do was be blind for thirty-four years. I am clearly winning the game of life. I expect other comedians at my level will now be considering blinding themselves in order to take advantage of this opportunity, but it’s too late, I got in there first and it’s unlikely they’ll cover the subject of stand-up comedy for a good while now. The secret of comedy is indeed timing.

The interview was recorded the day before the broadcast and the introduction was done separate to me being in the studio. I was asked to send them a little biogg, in which I outlined my various comedy awards and mentioned that I’d just been nominated Best Newcomer at the Chortle Awards. However, for some reason, it was announced on BBC Radio 4 just before my interview was played that I’d just been crowned Best Newcomer by the Chortle Awards. This, at the time of writing, untrue; the votes are still open.

On Monday I explained that the other comedians in the Best Newcomer category had gained Russian backing and that a vote for me would be an exercise in restoring our faith in our democratic system. I now present you with yet another reason to vote for me, and it is a second completely selfless motivation. The BBC is under threat enough as it is without having this journalistic inaccuracy about my Chortle Award win adding fuel to the fire and providing further reason for the anti-BBC brigade to call for the BBC to be shut down. However, if you all vote for me to win then in a week’s time I will have won, making the BBC’s claim accurate, thus protecting the journalistic integrity of the corporation and consequently helping to save this great British institution. So if you want to rescue both democracy and the BBC, then you know what needs doing. Vote here.

Then as a special treat for helping to save democracy and the BBC, you can listen to my BBC Radio 4 interview here.

I’ve been nominated as one of the five comedians in the Best Newcomer category at the Chortle Awards, run by the comedy website Chortle. It’s slightly awkward that the only comedy awards I seem able to win are ones under the Newcomer bracket, and some people might start to question how long I can feasibly be considered a Newcomer, given that I’ve now won Leicester Square New Comedian Of The Year in December 2019, New Comedian Of The Year at Bath Comedy Festival in April 2019, and Nottingham Comedy Festival’s New Comedian Of The Year prize in the summer of 2018. My aim is to keep winning New Comedian prizes right up until the point that I retire, or even better, continue to win Newcomer prizes even beyond my death. Eventually someone will surely cotton on, but in the meantime, while I’m still being considered a Newcomer you can vote for me to win this new Newcomer award. I have been contacted by an unnamed source to say that the other comedians in this category are receiving Russian backing, so this really is an opportunity to support a much bigger fight than a mere comedy award win. You can vote for me here.

Tomorrow I will be appearing on BBC Radio 4’s In Touch, talking about comedy. It’ll be live at 840pm, and I’ll put a link up here tomorrow. All manner of podcasts are in the offing, as well as a new video project which I’ll regale you all about very soon. But in the meantime, Vote for justice and democracy here