If you listened to the
”96th Southside Podcast
then I know you’ll all remember that I promised to put a link to my Nolan’s vs Groove armada mix, or bootleg, or mashup, or cutup, whichever terminology you prefer. I’m sure you all scrambled frantically to my blog, hoping that I would have put the link up immediately. Alas I did not for which I must apologize. I’m sure that by now you will have all found the mix on your own volition – I mean everyone knows how immensely intelligent David Eagle fans are. But a promise is a promise – in case you hadn’t realized – and so here are the links to the mix.

As I mentioned in my last post, I now have a
”Youtube channel,
and I’ve posted the mix on Youtube.
”this is the link.
You can also download a high quality MP3 file of the mix
”here.
I’ve provided this file in case there are any DJs reading who may want to use the mix in their next set, perhaps as a way of clearing the dance floor at the end of the night.

P.S. Alas, my fear has come true. I am no longer number one in the Google search results for David Eagle. I have somehow miraculously gone from being top of the charts to number 39. I assume that Google are aware of the error and are desperately trying to fix it before they lose all credibility as a search engine; but if you hear that Google have gone bust, then you know why? I’ll keep you updated on my chart position, and hopefully it will be only a matter of time before justice is done, and David eagle is back where he belongs – at at least number 30. I’m a little bit unsure as to what to suggest in order to hit Google the hardest, so that they will sit up and take heed. I was going to suggest that you all boycotted Google search completely, but then that would have a detrimental effect on my results because no one would be using Google to search for me. So maybe the answer is to only use Google when you are searching for things related to me. So your mission is to type David eagle into your search engines, locate my blog, and click on it. If all 3 of you do this then maybe I can be at number 30 by the end of this year. Well, a man’s got to dream!

It’s a pretty huge and significant day in the video sharing website Youtube’s existence. Up until now they have enjoyed immense popularity from users worldwide, but there was still something missing; a noticeable gaping hole in the Youtube infrastructure. But now, all that is changing thanks to yours truly, David Eagle. I’m fixing a hole – as the Beetles said. A sentiment no doubt echoed by thousands of professional and amateur hole fixers around the world. Come to think of it, what is actually meant by “fixing a hole”? Instinctively I assume that this refers to a hole being filled, meaning that the hole is in actuality being destroyed. If they were really fixing the hole, then they should in fact be making the hole more of a hole, smoothing it off, giving it a general makeover, rather than filling it in. You don’t go to the garage to get your car fixed and assume the mechanics will destroy it do you? You don’t call out an engineer to fix your TV and expect them to smash it to smithereens do you? Do you? Well, answer me do you? … Exactly! So why is it so different when it comes to holes. I’m sorry, but this has really riled me. I’m going to set up a hole protection society. I’ll do a leaflet campaign. That’s if I can actually post the leaflets through your letterbox. If the hole fixers get their first, then they’ll fill up your letterbox with concrete and seal it. Think about that. The beetles should be held responsible for this. Just because they happen to be aware of how many holes it takes to fill the albert Hall, I don’t think that gives them a right to start taking liberties when it comes to holes in general.

Anyway, where was I? O yes. The hole in YOutube’s infrastructure is no more, thanks to me, because finally, I have set up a proper Youtube channel with loads of material from various podcasts etc. Here is the link.
”http://www.youtube.com/user/onlineeagle
There’s quite a bit up there all ready, but my plan is to add loads more stuff and keep adding to it (until I finally realize that no one is looking at it, curl up into a ball and recoil from the world, depressed). Why not tell all your friends about it. Chances are they’ll have a look, think it’s crap, come to the conclusion that you’re a weird, pathetic maniac for liking such rubbish, and never talk to you again. But that’s hardly a bad thing. Christmas is just around the corner, and fewer friend’s equals fewer presents to buy, making you financially better off. Plus you’ll have no one to go out with of an evening, saving you even more money. Then there’s all the money saved from the texts you won’t be sending, the phone calls you won’t be making, all the letters you won’t be writing (not that you can actually send them letters anymore, since the hole fixers came along and sealed up their letterboxes). Some advice for you there on how to beat the credit crunch.

I’m a bit worried that I’ve written my most ludicrous blog post ever, and that the main point of the post has been totally lost in my meanderings. I’d like to apologize if any of my old English teachers from school are reading. I know some of my sentences were very poorly structured and very lengthy, with a few too many commas. I’ll make it up to you, I promise. I’ll write my next blog post completely conforming to the iambic pentameter structure, and end with a rhyming couplet.

So just to recap, you can visit my youtube channel here:
”http://www.youtube.com/user/onlineeagle
I’ll be back soon. In the meantime, stay safe, and for god’s sake, keep an eye on your holes!

I was walking down the street a few days ago, and a man (who clearly had a speech impediment) shouted across to me. “Oy! David Eagle! You’re a complete and utter ranker!” I had no idea what this speech impaired man could possibly be talking about, however today it has become clear what he must have meant. Last week, I was interested to see how my lack of blogging over recent weeks had affected my ranking in Google search. I was disappointed to note that I had drifted way off the top ten results to about number 20. It seemed as if, in my absence, other David Eagles had suddenly started to emerge. I cursed myself. Obviously I couldn’t afford to be complacent. In my blogging absence, it may have been the case that other David Eagles had all received good fortune – perhaps promotion in work or newly found celebrity status, propelling them higher up the Google search results table. I began to spiral into depression. I started taking drugs, sleeping with men and eating my own hair, but not even that could cheer me up. To think, I had lost my girlfriend, and now I discover I’ve plummeted down the Google search results. If only Shakespeare was still alive; he’d right a tragedy about this. But then today it all changed.

I typed David Eagle (that’s me by the way, in case you somehow hadn’t gathered that by now) into Google, and couldn’t believe my eyes – well my eyes have lied to me in the past and now I have trust issues. I’m seeing a therapist about it. They’re also sorting out the hair-eating thing too. Upon typing my name into Google, I discovered that not only was I back in the top ten, but was top of the list. I don’t know what happened. Perhaps I’ve suddenly acquired much more interest from people and am suddenly more popular. A more probable explanation is that all the other David EAgles in the world have suffered terrible misfortune – being sacked from their work, and ignored by the media spotlight. Perhaps there was a David Eagle convention organized, and all the high-ranking, successful David Eagles all attended. Perhaps they went abroad on holiday together and the plane crashed down and they were all killed. Maybe there’s an error with Google and by the time I’ve posted this blog I’m back at number 20 where I belong.

I’ve not checked any of the other search engines yet, but if MSN, Yahoo and the various other search engines want to maintain any credibility in the search engine world, then I suggest they make sure that I am number one on the David Eagle search results list. Bill gates, if you’re reading, heed my words.

So as my friend with the speech impediment so rightly pointed out, David Eagle is a complete and utter ranker. Number one! Here are the top ten results as they stand currently.

10: Some vicar.
9 A chamber music composer, who used to be number one all the time until I got in on the scene and started posting up material on the internet. He really must hate me. Hah!
8: My myspace radio page.
7: Some business director.
6 some random David Eagle from Wales. How does it feel to have your Ares whupped by an Englishman?
5 Some random blogger. A pretender to the throne.
4 Another radio presenter apparently. Perhaps he’s a tribute act for the real David Eagle. I’ll have to give him a listen. I bet he’s stealing my ideas, and presenting them as his own to the American audience. Damn him!
3 That business director is back again. Keep trying mate. Two words. Credit Crunch. Everyone knows that business is doomed.
2: The chamber music composer is back again. close but no cigar my friend, because there’s a new man – sorry Eagle – in town.
And at number one, it’s meeeeeeeee!

Right, I think I’ve milked this as much as I possibly can. The irony is that by posting this to the internet, I’ve increased the likelihood of getting more hits, meaning I’ll stand a good chance of staying at number one. I’m like ‘The Beatles’. All I need to do is release some more material and I’ll knock everyone else in the charts into oblivion – unless Vera Lynn happens to be around, but you get my point.

In other news, I’ve finally started tinkering with the Holland documentary. If anyone knows anything about the radio production world, then you’ll know how important the tinkering element is to making an award-winning documentary. Once the tinkering is finished I’ll let you know. In the meantime, I’d like to thank you all for making me number one. Don’t worry, I promise not to sell out. But if you would like to buy some ‘David Eagle: The Radio Experience’ T Shirts, mugs or table coasters then that would be great.

This week, we take a look at the delights of
’Filmstar’,
a new magazine. We find out about ‘500 Days of Summer’ – a new romantic comedy – and “the Movie that will change your life, forever!”
The Nolan Sisters talk about their new tour and their new album, as does singer songwriter
Tallulah Rendall,
who teams up with the Nolan’s in a unique collaborative effort which is exclusive to the ‘Southside Podcast’.
Award winning crime author
Martin Edwards
talks to us about his work, and the crime fiction genre.
And science fiction author and critic Alan Stevens enlightens us with how he listens to the ‘Southside Podcast’.
Plus, computer tips, Japanese sleve notes, incest and drinking games courtesy of David Eagle.

Please note, people with no hands are welcome. Just take your mouse with your foot and click
the download link
with your big toe.

Wow! Well what a crazy couple of months it’s been. I’ve been performing around Britain and Europe with my folk group
‘The Young’uns’
and I managed to get into a kind of weird long-distance relationship with a girl who started out amazing and then went a bit, er ….. psychotic. I don’t really feel it’s appropriate to blog about things like that, and so if you want to know all the exciting details then you’ll have to track me down, and attempt to make friends with me. Just be warned, there’s an elaborate process you have to go through before you can even be eligible for consideration as my friend. You have to be stringently vetted first. O, and it might hurt a bit too.

Anyway, the 95th ‘Southside Podcast’ has been released, and here is the description for it:

“It’s a highly emotionally charged podcast this week, as presenter David Eagle grapples with relationship problems.
Etiquette expert
Liz Brewer
talks about the success of her reality TV show ‘Laddette to Lady’, which is much better than the reality TV show ‘Coachtrip’ which gets a right-royal-rollicking.
Professor John Sutherland talks about the coolest heroes and iciest heroines in literature, based on research commissioned by an ice-lollies and smoothies company.
And “warm, rich and versatile” actor Philip Hurdwood talks about ‘The Archers’, adverts, and ethical and moral issues pertaining to acting,
Plus drunken, homeless continuity announcers, and do you ever wish you could fully express your love towards Southside’s Station Manager? Of course you do, and now there’s a way. All shall be revealed.
So pod on to the 95th Southside Podcast, but just be careful if you’re a pilot, ok?”

You can download it
here.

Another short post I’m afraid as I’m way behind on work, but don’t worry, I’ll be back before you can fill out the elaborate David Eagle befriending application form and then fathom out my X-girlfriend. So I’ll be back sometime in the next ten years then.

Take it easy guys. Life’s too short, ok? (A little bit of Solomonesque wisdom for you there. I think that’s a quote from the ‘Book of Proverbs’ or something.

It’s been nearly a month since I last blogged, and what a month it has been. Being twenty-four is really taking its toll. The aches, the pains, the responsibilities. It’s also been nearly a month since I last released a podcast, but fear not, the 94th ‘Southside Podcast’ is here, and this is the description for it:

This week,
psychic Tony Stockwell
on talking to the dead,
New York correspondent
Peter Franklin
on drunken lifeguards.
Find out why young and middle-aged people in Britain should be quaking in their boots – or respective footwear.
And we’ve an interview with a rather confused railway enthusiast, who’s not quite sure of his name or what train he’s on.
Plus, presenter David Eagle shows off his rapping skills, and there’s a chance to play along with our exciting, new, and probably one-off feature ‘Guess the song lyric’, in which you have to try and guess the song from a lyric. How do we come up with these ideas?
There’s a unique travelogue on the delights of Germany, covering all the essentials, such as sausage, beer, crazed taxi drivers and how the Germans seem to cope with blindness. So pod on Perl & Dean style to the 94th ‘Southside Podcast’, which could never be said to be anything like a pikestaff. O no! So don’t even think about saying such a thing, all right?

You can download it
here.

I didn’t write a blog post from Germany, but I’ve hopefully made up for that by providing some anecdotes of my travels in the podcast. I’m off to Holland this week for a festival, and I plan on making a documentary on it. I recorded some stuff from Holland last year but didn’t do anything with it. My plan is to combine this year’s audio with last year’s and create a super-special documentary, unless of course I’m really lazy and decide instead to record some more material next year and combine it with the last two years to create the best god damn documentary on Holland Maritime festivals in the world.

Anyway, this is going to be another short post as Microsoft word keeps crashing every two minutes and I’m starting to go psychotic, shouting and swearing at the computer. If you want more information about what I’m talking about then
check out my previous blog post on computers
Be back soon. Button Moon.

So, just in case you hadn’t gathered from my highly cryptic blog post title, this is my first blog post at the age of 24. I’m sure you’ll start noticing a more mature and responsible approach to my posts – political comment, and opinions on the stock market index. From now on I’ll ration myself to just one fart joke per week. Anyway,

I know how difficult it can often be to find that perfect gift to give someone on there birthday that really sums up your feelings of immense love towards them. I know this because I didn’t receive anything this year, and I’m sure that’s got to be the reason why. But you don’t need to worry. I’ve got the perfect present that will instantly demonstrate your love towards the person on their special day. The 93rd ‘Southside Podcast’! If you want to make the gift even more special, then why not burn the podcast on to a CD, create your own artwork and wrap it up with a pretty bow on top. Wow!

It’s also my first podcast at the age of 24, so you can listen to hear how age has affected my voice. But that’s not all you’ve got to look forward to. Here is the OFFICIAL description for this week’s podcast:

It’s 40 years since the first moon landing, and to commemorate this we feature a discussion with Sir Patrick Moore, who tells us what his favorite cake is. O yes, and he talks about the first moon landing a little too.
And from that we move to a moon walker of a different kind. Michael Jackson’s death remains a primary focus point in the media, and this week, award winning concert pianist Lucy Parham talks about the dangers of being in the media spotlight, and the problems of being branded a genius, referring to classical composers such as Mozart. Plus she warns of the perils of performing outdoor music festivals.
Singer songwriter Tallulah Rendall seems to have been spending her time recently running around in woodland pretending to be a nymph. Come on! we’ve all been there. Tallulah explains all.
And with all that craziness going on, we try to calm things down a bit with best selling author and life coach Lynn Serafinn who focuses our attention on the spiritual, and talks about ‘the garden of the soul’.
So ‘Pod On’™ batman style to the 93rd Southside Podcast.
You can download it
here

As I say, a perfect birthday present, plus you can give them a special birthday cake based on the suggestion of Sir Patrick Moore. Genius!

Anyway, this is meant to be a short post because I’ve got to pack tonight for going to Germany tomorrow with my folk group,
‘The Young’uns’
to perform at a festival.. I’ll maybe post an update from Germany if I get the time, although I’m 24 now and I don’t have the energy I once had, so I might not get round to it.

Celebrity stand-up comedian, actor and Voice Over
Marty Ingels offers a unique and perhaps controversial perspective on the death of Michael Jackson. Marty lives with his wife, the infamous actress and singer
Shirley Jones in the same street as the Jackson family. You can hear both Marty Ingells and Shirley Jones, with some momentous Shirley Jones news by listening to
This week’s ‘Southside Podcast’. Retired actor, director and drama coach Jack Lin extols the work of
John Barrowman and tells us what it was like to be the drama coach for
Anthony Hopkins. He also has a bit of a rant about reality shows such as ‘Britain’s got talent’. A man after my own heart, if you recall.
my own blog post on the subject. Jack Lynn is currently residing in a place called
Denville Hall, a retirement home for actors. I’d love to be a fly on the wall in that home. I don’t think Jack Lynn would be offended if I described him as a little eccentric. I think most people working in showbiz or in creative jobs are often thought of as a little eccentric. I suppose they have to be. Anyway, imagine some of the crazy conversations that must take place in the home. I wonder whether they randomly start acting out scenes they’ve previously starred in. I expect some of the more senile actors would certainly do this. It must get very confusing for the staff. Perhaps a fly on the wall documentary is needed although I’ve probably blown my chances by admitting that I’m merely interested in going there to be entertained by senile dementia. You can’t get away with anything nowadays. Political correctness has seen to that. You can even get into trouble just by mentioning the word “homosexuals”, as I explained in
previous blog post. Oo, I’m getting all nostalgic.

And the acting theme continues on the podcast this week as in the studio we have actor and horse racing commentator
Malcolm Tomlinson. Malcolm currently plays the school principal in
‘Hollyoaks’. His daughter
Eleanor Tomlinson is also an actor and has been described as the next
keira-knightley. We don’t just talk to actors though, o no. We speak to celebrity wedding planner
Siobhan Craven-Robins and find out about a
new reality TV show on ‘UK Living’ called ‘Four weddings’. The concept sounds hideous. Basically it’s like
‘Come Dine with Me’ but instead of judging four different people’s meals, they judge each others’ weddings. Is nothing sacred? Also we speak with science fiction authors and critics
Alan Stevens and Fiona Moore about the recent ‘torchwood’ television series and other SF stuff. And you can download it
here.
Actress Shirley Jones has appeared in many films and TV programs and worked alongside many prestigious and talented actors. One of these actors was
Burt Lancaster.
I was reminded of a film that Bert Lancaster played the lead part in. It’s a really strange film called ‘The Swimmer’. I’ve never watched the whole film so have no idea how good it is. It’s meant to be quite poignant and touching although I’m not entirely sure you would get that impression from the trailer. It’s a bit surreal. Basically it’s about a man who decides to make his way home by swimming in all the garden pools on-route. So he just jumps over someone’s fence, whips off his clothes, jumps in their pool and does a lap of honour before jumping over the next fence to do the same in the next garden pool, until he reaches home. On his adventure he meets many beautiful women who fall in love with him. Listen out for the epic line “we made love in this pool remember? and you loved it”. I suppose it’s kind of like Jack Kerouac, only ‘in the Pool rather than ‘on the Road’. Anyway you can watch the trailer
here.
Yours truly David Eagle, a very special human being!

Once again, I’m writing from the bus. It’s like a minimalist music composition on the bus today. There’s a constant rhythmic beeping from the front of the bus, which is rhythmically synchronised with the swishing of the windscreen wipers. Now and again, the indicators join in, with some thematic interplay. Either that or the driver of the bus is a mad, evil genius who is using these constant, repeating, rhythmic sounds to hypnotise all the passengers on-board , programming our minds, ready for the day when he uses us as military cattle in his bid to overthrow the world’s governments and rule over the earth for ever. Hmmmmm, must stop eating cheese before bed. Well it’s either the cheese or the mind-altering drugs that’s making me think like this.

Anyway, looking around me, at my fellow passengers on the bus, I detect a few bored faces. If only they knew just how exciting their long bus journeys could be. If only they’d heard of the
‘Southside Podcast’. 90 quality podcasts to download and listen to whenever and wherever you want. No wait, make that 91 quality podcasts because the 91st ‘Southside Podcast’ is available to download. Here’s the description for it:

This week Southside sample the best in antipodean culture courtesy of ‘Toast Festival’, featuring Polynesian dancing and authentic New Zeeland cuisine. We talk to tree sculptors and jousting lady knights at 2009’s Lincolnshire Show. We visit Middlesbrough’s first-ever literary festival and speak with author marina Fiorato. And it’s the last-ever Royal Show after 170 years of existence; The Royal Show’s manager Simon Frere-Cook explains the reason for it’s end, celebrates it’s history and looks ahead to the future working with the Royal agricultural Society.

Plus, what did one font say to the other font?.. Find out on this week’s Southside Podcast, as we “Pod On” ™ with the sounds of ‘Last of the Summer Wine’, guillotines and exploding bodies. It’s just your everyday ‘Southside Podcast’.

And the download link is
here

P.S. In case there are any folkies reading this, I want to briefly acknowledge the passing of a great friend (and I suppose you could say mentor, certainly inspiration) to my folk group ‘The Young’uns’, the amazing folk and shanty singer Johnny Collins. I won’t elaborate any further on this subject here because I’m rubbish at putting strong and genuine sentiments like this into words, plus the folk forum ‘Mudcat’ has an excellent and fitting
obituary to Johnny written by his many friends and fans. It would be great if we can make some kind of podcast that celebrated his life, full of tributes, personal anecdotes and memories of Johnny. I’ll have a think about it and gage other people’s thoughts on the matter. Anyway, that’s all I can think to say. I’ve sat for over half an hour trying to think of something apt, poetic and poignant but I think the forum can do that much better along with his music, including this
youtube clip which in spite of its terrible sound quality, still manages to capture the passion and enthusiasm for music that Johnny expressed to the very end.

Thanks for reading.